Morgan (she shot the photos of me below)-- first pro digital shot by me

Best way to describe my life up till now is to use the metaphor of a new TV show.

it gets rave reviews, the audience is captivated and interested with the first few episodes. But the network isn't satisfied with the ratings and it's not actually promoted it right. So lots of potential viewers are missing out on it.

Then it gets canceled like most good TV shows do nowadays. And the potential for it to get a surprise return to the network like Family Guy is nil.

I have found myself not eating breakfast as of late. And not eating till like 2 in the afternoon. Plus not really in the mood to eat dinner either. Someone said that could be a sign of cancer. Me I think, I'm just dissapointed in my limbo life right now. No word on the graduate schools I applied to, still waiting to start the gig at complex , and just let down in my personal life again.

Now the question is how long am i going to languish in my own doubts and negative expectations. i don't know... i'm just sad...