Photo by Richard Louissaint

Alas my life is just a pile of ever-changing and revolving door. my grad school applications are all sent out, i've been unemployed for two months with my bills about to be overdue or on their way.

i've realized how much i don't know how to sell myself, cause as Koku says i should have so many gigs with the experience and talent i have. But i don't :(. But i finally got a hold of the Complex editor i interviewed with weeks ago and says he will try me out in the middle of this month.

That's some relief but it's still not set in stone.

And my circle of people to hang with has really changed in quite a short time to more consistent groups for me to actually head out to things with. from Friendster heads, to cousins who i never really hung out with before, to struggling writers who i've come up with, and okayplayers new and old. it feels like such a melting pot and in a good way.

This also means that if i had a social events and invited these people and my parents -- the parents might be floored in a "Umm wow this is a rather interesting group of people and no one Christian among them. my father would be the least surprised, but my mom would be surprised by the amount of women i am cool with. then she would ask so how come one isn't ur girlfriend?" LOL. and if they were really observant would notice the lesbians and such among them. yep that would an interesting point of the event.

And i fear writing about my "dating/love life" since i don't really date and know many read this page. But i do from time to time find myself fond of folks. And i find myself fond and/or folks fond of me. But i can't read women for nothing when it comes to my appeal. So i have almost found it safe to be the platonic friend so as to not play myself, well except for the lady who recently emailed me after meeting me and basically playing the role of the aggressor. This was all appreciated since i hate trying to read signals all the time.

MESSAGE FROM RICH: PLEASE IF U THINK I AM CUTE OR INTERESTING PLEASE LET ME KNOW. ME IS A BAD SIGNAL READER.

and so i find myself with possible options with no intention of being serious with anyone unless it happens naturally. normally at this point this strategy tends to fall apart, but i believe with a smart approach it can work --- and yes honesty.

but i have met some interesting ladies of late each with very dope qualities an some i ma not really sure where they stand right now.

i hope it doesn't end up like that Eric Roberson son, "She Couldn't Hear Me."