"The shining" - Badly Drawn Boy
"Now i've fallen deep
into slow silent sleep
it's killing me
i'm dying
to put a little sunshine in your life"

As i listen to the song mentioned above on my updated Mac OS X Panther system, i kind of feel like that nowadays, of course you could substitute the "your" with "my".

i think i've always want to put sunshine in someone's life, but can't always because i lack sunshine in my life internally sometimes.

But alas i am just tired of dealing with folks who "like me" but are still pining over someone else.
I know many can relate to meeting someone who is interested in you but someone where down the line they drop the ball. i thought as i got closer to 30 i would have to deal with less of this.

Cause as they say the older you get the more mature you get and more sure of what you want. But i already know that's a lie. and i guess this stems to my Jaded 20s rant yesterday. But why do i find myself pining over these people even when i know i am in second place in the "race" for their affection. Cyncism and pessimism have always been my best sheild but i'm tired especailly with those who make teh first move to get to know.

but oh "soul refreshing" (c) Robert Randolph

OH AND KIDDIES NEGATIVE BANK BALANCES ARE NOT COOL.