"Nearly Civilized" - Esthero and "Since I Seen't You" - Anthony Hamilton

Europeans have alwyas been bent on the idea that they are civilized. Passing these ideals onto those they conquered and enslaved in the wake of imperilaism.

Europeans have always been bent on the idea that they are civilized. Passing these ideals onto those they conquered and enslaved in the wake of imperialism.

but screw all that, i hate being constrained to what is acceptable and unacceptable in social realms. my check to columbia is in danger of bouncing unless i finally get my checks from the source and other publications.

many need to remind me that i am on a sinking ship, but i have been there twice. i'll survive and keep pushing on until something pops in my starving artist livelihood.

i've been spending a lot of time with cousins this past month. when ur father has over 10 siblings you get a lot of them. i had secluded myself from family for a lot of reasons. but mainly cause i feel like the odd ball, the eccentric. Yet many cousins reiterate how famous I'm gonna be, while to call me "special."

I think it's been a good thing, as i have found my weekends pretty social despite not hearing from friends and such. family tend to be in my case more apt to hanging out if i ask them to. so hey.

What was one thing a year ago can change regardless of whether you want it to or not. the friends and acquaintances i interacted with a lot before have changed. their circles have changed and some of mine have also.

Some friends, i wish, still felt like friends, and some have just shown less regard for my friendship.

yes so i seem a bit bitter and somewhat angry